Sunday, October 20, 2013

Seraena is an Introvert.

It can get extremely frustrating living in a society of people who make assumptions about you because you are quiet. A lot of people have misconceptions about me.

I am introverted. I am not shy. I thought I was, because it's a label constantly thrown on me. They are not the same. Being around people does not intimidate me. I see right through to the insecurity of lots of loud people all the time.

1) People assume quiet people don't like to talk. Not true. I just don't like to talk excessively about nothingness. And ESPECIALLY over the phone (Dear GOD not the phone). A few of my friends assume I don't love (or like) them because I don't call them. Please don't do this. To be honest I hate the phone. But I love YOU (I really do). And I love talking in person to you. You can text me though. As an introvert I think texting is one of the greatest inventions of all time.
But back to nothingness. I just find small talk to be boring. I'm not really a "chit chat" chick. I understand the need for it, I mean everybody can't be deep all the time and neither am I, but I just feel like if I don't have anything interesting or productive to say, I'd rather not talk at all. I think before I speak. I do a lot more thinking (and daydreaming. And fantasizing, LOL) than speaking. I don't always find it necessary to share my opinion or fill every gap of silence with idle noise. I like the phrase "If somebody's talking, somebody's lying."

2) People assume that quiet people are not outgoing. I like to go out. LOL. I just don't need to go out as much as extroverted people do. I've done a lot of things. With a lot of people. I just don't talk about them *wink*

3) People assume I am weak or timid because I am quiet. I'm very FAR from it. How about I just don't prefer to engage low minded people. More power to you if you have the energy for that. I DON'T.

4) I am not weird. I am not anti-social. I am not mean. I am not lonely or sad or depressed (although folks' ignorance can cause this). I am not a little mouse in need of a mother hen. I just don't require lots of people time. And noise. And busybodies <--- (these people need to be shipped to Pluto).

5) I find that spending time with myself is more energizing and stimulating than spending time in the presence of people. I read & research things, I write out my thoughts & ideas, I work out, I listen to music..those things alone provide just enough mental & emotional stimulation to keep me preoccupied for hours. How does anyone get the time to feel bored?? I previously never understood people who constantly say that, but perhaps introversion/extroversion plays a role.

The reality is, the world is bias toward extroverted people. The world values the traits of being aggressive, loud & talkative and high energy. That is equated with success and happiness. Introverted people are forced to fake it to fit in; they are mistakenly (and annoyingly) labeled as shy, told to "loosen up" and "come out of their shell"; they are treated like something is wrong with them or "less than" because they aren't constantly making noise and seeking attention from other people. Well I'm speaking out about it, so to speak (LOL)! No seriously, the bias is overrated, predictable and quite old. Quiet people do not need to be ashamed for being who they are. The world needs more people like us :)

A good interview about introverts: http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=the-power-of-introverts

Excellent myth busting article about introverts: http://http://www.carlkingdom.com/10-myths-about-introverts

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